On Wednesday, Vishnu Vishal shared a letter offering detailed insights into his journey with mental depression and anxiety. Saying his new letter is no "call for sympathy," the actor wrote that he started to experience stress and depression back in 2018, and while "a lot has changed" for him over the last many years, "some things, surprisingly, remain the same."
Talking about his lessons from 2018 to now, the actor added, "Ever since I entered cinema, every passing year came with the hope that I would eventually “settle down” and have a stable life. I was always a big introvert, so adapting to this industry, to people, to the constant uncertainty and to the emotional highs and lows was challenging and, at times, painful. Slowly and steadily, after many successful films, just when I thought I was beginning to find my feet with Ratsasan, my personal life took a setback. That was when I first experienced the signs of depression and anxiety."
Vishnu Vishal felt that he could deal with his issues by focusing more on his cinema career and that "one BIG BLOCKBUSTER would change everything" he experienced. However, he said his anxiety grew with the arrival of the coronavirus pandemic and the uncertainty associated with it. "I fought back and gave big successes in FIR and Gatta Kusthi post-COVID, and I thought, “Okay… now everything will be fine.” But the next few years brought their own challenges," the actor shared. He also cited "false promises" from producers and directors, causing him to extend his committed dates for filming and "and occasionally spent months without work to live up to his commitments. "All this without getting paid even for my original committed dates," Vishnu added.
Having to balance his personal and career issues with the finances of his production house meant more anxiety for the actor, causing him to seek counselling. "Over these eight years, I have had multiple counselling sessions. For the last three years especially, I have been very regular with therapy. I have also taken medication for anxiety and depression on a few occasions, under professional guidance," he noted.
Vishnu Vishal said that despite the success of Gatta Kusthi 2, "nothing has changed" for him. "Slowly, I think I am finally beginning to understand something. THE NEXT BIG SUCCESS IS NOT GOING TO FIX ANYTHING FOREVER. From the age of 13 when I started my career as a cricketer, all I wanted was to be successful. I wanted my work to be noticed and appreciated by this world. Somewhere along the way, while chasing the BIG PICTURE, I lost many small, beautiful moments," he added.
Saying "cinema will never be completely stable," the actor made a promise to himself to not miss small moments in life that make him happy "for some imaginary BIG PICTURE." He added, "earn the money you rightly deserve. Save and plan for the future. But also live."
