Bhavana: I don't want my personal life to define my career

Even while I was on a sabbatical from Malayalam, I was still active in Kannada cinema. During this period, I was getting several offers from here, but I was not ready. I kept pondering if I should ever come back to Malayalam, but all my well wishers urged me not to decline good offers. After a point, even I felt that maybe it's time to resume work here. When Ntikkakkakkoru Premondarnn was first pitched, I knew that it was not something groundbreaking, but I still felt it would make a nice, feel-good film. Then I did a cameo in Shanker Ramakrishnan's Rani. When Jean (Paul Lal) first told me about Nadikar in the beginning of 2022, I was initially hesitant, but still decided to do it. For Hunt, I was first approached by producer Radhakrishnan chettan, with whom I had worked earlier in Winter (2009). I also liked how the horror element was treated in it. Then there's Shaji sir. So, it's a team I'm comfortable and familiar with. Looking back, I think these are the two main factors that made me say yes to all these projects.

I did Chinthamani Kolacase (2006) when I was just a couple of years old in industry. I was scared to work with such a senior director, but Shaji sir was friendly and comforting. It's different working with seniors. There's a certain pattern they follow and it still prevails.

Currently, I'm doing two Malayalam films made by debutants. One is a comedy entertainer and the other is a thriller. I've been associated with both these projects right from the initial discussions. We work as a team, sharing suggestions and queries constantly. In Jean's films, be it Honey Bee (2013) or Nadikar, I was not part of it as just an actor. I was involved in every discussion, including the shot divisions. But with seniors like Shaji sir, Hariharan sir or Joshiy sir, the working process is entirely different. Apart from some occasional suggestions, our part is mostly limited to delivering what they want from us.

Of course the first, because it brings multiple perspectives and suggestions into the picture. You can't do a film assuming that what I'm doing is always right. But at the same time, these seniors have already proven their command over the craft. They'd have a certain clarity in their mind and we just have to tune ourselves to it.

I love doing humour, be it Chotta Mumbai (2007), Happy Husbands (2010), Angry Babies in Love (2014) or Adventures of Omanakuttan (2017). I enjoyed playing these roles, but I'm more delighted when people say they enjoyed watching my performance. During Omanakuttan's shoot, I used to constantly crack jokes and the assistant directors had a hard time controlling their laughter. I feel happy when I'm able to make people laugh.

My regrets are mostly about the choice of people I worked with, including my managers. When I started out, my father and manager used to choose my projects and I'd just do whatever they picked. I was 15 when I debuted, so my opinions weren't taken seriously. I think Chithiram Pesudhadi (2006) was the first film that I chose on my own. Gradually, my father also started trusting my instincts. I can't blame him either, because I was too young then. In my 30s, I'm still ambitious about my career and often get depressed. But as a person, I'm more happy and content than ever. I enjoy spending quality time with my puppies, friends, family or watching films. I have my own bubble; where I'm happy and don't have to prove anything to anyone. That's what I meant by that post.

I wish for that 'remarkable shift', but I can only choose from what I get. I can't just sit here and wish for a Manjummel Boys, right? (laughs). Among the 20 films I'm offered today, I pick only one or two. It's easy for me to do them all, make some money and get back to my comforts. But I know I'll be depressed. There have been instances where I signed a project after being impressed by the narration, only to realise on sets that it's not the one initially pitched. It gets me anxious, but the truth is, I'm helpless. I'm not a superstar or an actor with great market value to stall the shoot immediately and ask the director for a complete revamp. I have no other option but to play along. But like I said earlier, if it's a good, amicable team, I can always raise my concerns.

Yes, it happens. The moment people say it's a strong, bold character, I can't help but take them with a pinch of salt. At the end of the day, it's not about the character's braveness, but how appealing the script is to the public. I'm also wary of not getting stereotyped in such 'bold' roles. I don't want what's going on in my personal life to define my career.

Firstly, I'm not really into social media. I don't share much about my personal life there, but people still question why I'm not sharing photos with my husband regularly. They automatically assume that I'm divorced or separated, but why should I be proving them wrong? I can't go up to Naveen every time and say, 'Come, let's click a pic so that I can share on social media and show it to these people?' That won't be me. I don't live on social media.